7 People You’ll Meet in College (Part 1)

Ahh, college. It is truly a magical land full of magical people with personalities and habits of multifarious sorts. You never know what gems you’ll run into on this captivating journey through your golden years, but I guarantee you’ll be able to better identify them and prepare yourself for future encounters after scrolling through this useful guide. Let me stand in your way no longer; it is time now to explore the first 7 People You’ll Meet in College (Part 1).

*Author’s Note: These descriptions are all absolute generalizations referred to for entertainment purposes only. Enjoy!


 

1) The Napper

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The Napper

Dialogue: “Hey, do you want to hang out?” “No, sorry, I’m taking a nap.”

“I’m just going to close my eyes for a minute.”

Signs to look for: gets comfortable whenever finding a new location, puts head down, slouches while sitting, droopy eyelids, drifts off in class, snoring, carries a pillow around, wears pajamas in public in case of emergency nap, handwriting in notebook from class turns from pristine to undecipherable hieroglyphics as falling asleep in class ensues

Weaknesses: misses out on social events, cannot sleep well at night, sleeps through class or meetings, feels the need to nap daily

Strengths: constantly well-rested, exemplifies “beauty sleep,” ready to tackle the day, refreshed, after napping the host is alive, awake, alert, and enthusiastic

2) The Flirt

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The Flirt

Dialogue: “Are you a library book? ‘Cause I’m checking you out.” 

“Are you two dating?” “Well, we’re ‘talking.'” (WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?!)

“Can I have your number?”

Signs to look for: uses pickup lines, asks for help on the next quiz when he/she aced the last one, texts multiple girls/boys at the same time (sometimes even texts the same thing to everyone), asks to hang out, texts you when you get back to your room after hanging out, offers to swipe you into the cafeteria (thank you, prepaid meal plan, thank you), compliments your shoes, tells you your hair smells nice, tells you the back of your head is ridiculous,

(Signs that the Flirt is into you if you are a hopeless romantic: the Flirt looks at you, the Flirt exists on the same planet as you)

Weaknesses: flirting with everyone can tick people off, gives mixed signs, are you exclusive or not?!, simply annoying, blunt, not everyone accepts flirtations

Strengths: has confidence, is forward, takes initiative, makes things happen, makes people feel good about themselves with compliments, makes people feel desirable/wanted

3) The Nerd

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The Nerd

Dialogue: “Hey, did you see that episode of The Big Bang Theory last night?”

“No, I was working on my paper.”

“But that paper is due in two months.”

“I know. What’s your point?”

“I finished mine last Saturday night.”

Signs to look for: name on the Dean’s list, wearing a bookbag so tightly packed with books it resembles a small planet, pocket protector, puts five pencils on his/her desk during test day (just in case), is always the last one to finish taking a test, sets up meetings with professors to discuss 97% grades on papers/exams, asks for extra credit when GPA in class is only a 3.99, has a Star Trek poster, owns a fanny pack, wears the same shirt the entire finals week because there is no time for changing clothes

Weaknesses: too focused on studies to enjoy college life, all work and no play, doesn’t exist during midterms or finals week, builds up so much knowledge that there is little room for remembering personal conversations and memories, forgets to leave room due to constant studying

Strengths: being successful, getting money’s worth out of college, deserves the degree, makes it to the top, has adoring fans who always knew the Nerd was destined to prosper

4) The Asker

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The Asker

Dialogue: “Can you give me a ride to the grocery store/this great restaurant/the mall/my appointment/the gym/my dorm building that is one hundred feet away?”

“Can I borrow your notes/sneakers/money/shirt/brush/car/textbook?”

“Can you spot me? I want to buy ice cream/get a haircut/put gas in my car/buy a cat. I’ll pay you back.”

Signs to look for: is always asking for something, promises to make it up to you, doesn’t feel guilty about asking, when you see his/her name on your caller ID you know you’ll be lending out your vacuum/speakers/favorite shirt/CD/cookie tray again

Weaknesses: asking for favors constantly gets old, annoying, people start to avoid the Asker

Strengths: gets what he/she wants, can handle rejection, solid persuasive skills, works those communication skills, builds trusting relationships, still has my DVD copy of Spice World

5) The Jokester

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The Jokester

Dialogue: “Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants to his match? Huh? Anyone? No takers? …In case he got a hole-in-one! HAHAHAHAH OH MY FERRETS THAT IS HYSTERICAL PURE COMICAL GENIUS WHY AREN’T YOU LAUGHING I AM DYING TEARS THERE ARE TEARS FLOWING FROM MY EYES I AM GETTING AN AB WORKOUT RIGHT NOW I HAVE TO PEE wow I am hilarious.”

Signs to look for: laughing at his/her own jokes, quick to have a conversation in puns, every time he/she wants to tell you something it is probably something funny to him/her, laughs alone in public, lame, often smiling, someone who brightens others’ days

Weaknesses: rarely serious, rarely taken seriously by others, doesn’t take well to people with serious attitudes, is too busy thinking of jokes and puns that it gets in the way of real conversations, ability to think so quickly and formulate impressive comebacks can get the Jokester in trouble, feels the need to keep people entertained even when the time isn’t right, can be the “insult” Jokester

Strengths: quick-witted, always capable of firing an effective response, makes light of situations, makes people laugh, entertains a crowd (at the right place and the right time), makes people smile, makes others’ days easier with a light attitude


6) The Eater

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The Eater

 

Dialogue: “Are you going to eat that?”

“What time are you going to dinner?”

“Can I have a bite?”

Signs to look for: loves to eat/snack, has shelves full of only the finest delicacies (Dunkaroos, Fruit by the Foot, Oreos, granola bars, popcorn, roasted almonds, bananas, Hershey’s Kisses, etc.), always hungry, asks for a snack when visiting your room, obviously loves food, always chooses to go to a restaurant when it’s his/her turn to make plans

Weaknesses: strongly values food, spends money on food, may or may not have a good relationship with the gym, food is always on the mind, eats even when he/she is not hungry, simply cannot decline someone offering to share a bite even if the sharer is just being polite

Strengths: has the best snacks (related weakness: doesn’t share them), can clean out your pantry of food you don’t want anymore, keeps you from eating all of the snacks, is easily entertained with a bag of chips, always up for going to events on campus that offer free food

7) The Athlete

The Athlete

The Athlete

Dialogue: “What are you doing between 4 p.m. and 10 p.m.?” “I’ll be at the gym.” “But it’s between 4 p.m. and 10 p.m.” “Yes.”

“Do you want to eat one of these beautiful cupcakes?” “No, thank you. I’ll just indulge in this here peanut butter protein bar and hideous-looking health shake concoction. Mmm.”

Signs to look for: wears athletic shorts/t-shirts/sneakers/cutoff shirts, wears headphones, carries around a drawstring bag and a water bottle, whips out a military boot camp training itinerary upon arrival at the gym, takes stretching seriously, prepares a proper warm-up and cool down, actually wants to go to the gym, does victory dances when exceeding maximum weight-lifting goals

Weaknesses: highly susceptible to breakdowns when unable to work out, frown upon people wearing yoga pants outside of doing yoga (just kidding), some Athletes wake up disgustingly early or stay up unreasonably late to go running, swimming, etc. which can instill fear, confusion and feelings of inferiority in others, the “Freshman 15”

Strengths: goal-oriented, (often can be) team players, passionate, hard-working, driven, healthy, strong, dedicated, ambitious, focused on a hobby beneficial to one’s own body


 

Have you ever met any individuals like the ones mentioned above? I know I have. Honestly, my personality applies to about 97.4% of the people mentioned. Stay tuned for more People You’ll Meet in College!

 

 

 

This entry was posted in Uncategorized by Tori Lynn. Bookmark the permalink.

About Tori Lynn

Call me Tori. I supply my own happiness, but I always accept extra. I'm as excited as ever to take on spontaneous journeys and to welcome the small-but-important every day opportunities and blessings that come my way.

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